What I Learned From Camping

1. That when it rains like crazy with lightning and thunder that blinds and deafens you, it doesn't matter as long as you have a hand to hold.

2. That when you try to be nice and dance with the shy guys standing in the corners, it doesn't always work out.

2a. George was a very shy guy, with a sunburnt nose and crooked glasses. I picked him because he had red hair. Unfortunately, his personality was not as bright and interesting as his hair was.

3. That when wearing a bikini, MAKE SURE IT IS TIED ON SECURELY, or else your nephew just might take off your top in front of everyone in the pool.

4. That taking your puppy into the tent and leaving her there might mean sleeping in poop-ified sleeping bags.

5. That your family counts as your best group of friends in the world. In the end, all you'll have is your family. Trust them and treat them like you treat your best friend.

6. That dads can be very entertaining.

6a. "Wiffle ball: pronounced wiff-a-ball. A game where you use a ball with holes in it so you are able to stick in some weed. When the ball comes by, you wiff it!"

7. That mothers can be very entertaining.

7a. "LAST NIGHT WAS TERRIBLE. I WAS UP ON MY KNEES PRAYING THE WHOLE TIME FOR THE STORM TO PASS."

8. That no matter how much bug spray you might have sprayed on, the bugs are actually completely immune to it. They will bite you a million and one times over.

9. That a Chorkie can swallow chicken faster than you can say it's name.

10. That despite the fact you were not looking forward to camping, the experience is always great.